Monday Ruminations

It’s hard not to feel cynical on Monday’s at the tale end of winter, as the north wind keeps it’s icy fingers wrapped tight around my bones on the early morning bike commute to work. Am I having an existential crisis? I doubt it. Perhaps just feeling a bit less enamored with the reality that is daily middle class life, the life I find myslef in in North America. Or is it just my middle class life?

Let’s see here –get up every morning at 6:30 and take a shower and dress business casual for work. I make oatmeal for B and I and a carafe of coffee, French pressed, and then I sit under the SAD light either checking email or reading a book or magazine. Later I ride my bike to work, dodging winter potholes and black ice and trying all the while not to get bike rage as some asshole speeds around me to get to the red light ten yards ahead. I’ll be three blocks down the street by the time he/she power-tripper gets a green for go. {Asshole drivers –just cause you'r driving and I’m pedaling don’t mean we both don’t have to be somewhere}. Then I sit at work and shuffle papers and email with equal intensity until it’s time to call it a day. Sometimes I work through lunch and split early for sunset surfs in icy waters.

Yesterday, as I paddled back to the peak I watched Black Spidey take off late, make it out of the white water and arc a bottom turn just in time to squeeze under the throwing lip for a three second Nova Scotia barrel -a rare site indeed around these parts. Spidey was thrilled for the cover up and I was stoked to get a front row view of my friend in the position that many of us who surf are always striving for. So last night, feeling inspired, I finished my botched ding repair job on the biofoam by patiently sanding the epoxy to blend perfectly with the original outline of the nose. And I felt pleased with the fruits of my labour.

Perhaps my problem is that I find endless pleasure in things which do not provide for my livelihood and disdain for the things that feed and clothe me. Disdain may have been too strong a word in the last sentence so I’ll change it to disinterest. How about disengagement? Disenchantment? Bottom line is that I spend most of my waking life doing things that I could care less for. How’s that for freedom in the western world? Or maybe I’m just another of the people described by this ultra cynical and self-righteous blogger http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com -except that I’m from a multicultural background and only just perpetratin.

"break yoself fool!"